Assisted Suicide Story in the Psych Ward

WARNING: This post talks openly about suicide so please do not read if you are triggered at all by this topic.

Also, SPOILER ALERT: this talks about the plot of *that* Coronation Street episode so if you haven't watched it yet, don't read this just yet.

In the psych ward I'm in, there are three rooms where patients can access a television. One is in the main day area, one in the female quiet lounge and the third in the general quiet lounge. Last night, I was sat in the female quiet lounge talking to another patient when the night nurse walked in and told us that she was putting Coronation Street on in both of the quiet lounges and that it wouldn't be on in the main day area. I looked a bit puzzled so the nurse told me that there was an assisted suicide story on that night.

Half a Day in A and E

To those not from the UK, A and E is Accident and Emergency, also known as the Emergency Room in other countries. Also, there is talk of hospital and psych wards throughout this piece so if you are triggered by these topics, please leave the page now.

What's it Like to Hear Nasty Voices?

This blog post is about what it is like to hear nasty voices and may contain triggers. Some people hear voices which aren't nasty and they can have a positive experience with their voices. This is about the nasty voices though, which can make life extremely difficult.

Seven years ago at the age of 18, I started experiencing my first auditory hallucination. This voice seemed determined to get me to kill myself and the first few days and weeks were extremely difficult for me as I had struggled a lot with suicidal thoughts before it started. At the time, I was at college, and I was getting in trouble a lot because I wasn't doing enough work. However, this wasn't teenage rebellion or laziness, this was because I simply couldn't hear the tutor over the noise of the voice. My concentration was poor too, and I was easily distracted by what the voice was saying to me.

Psych Wards and the Police

In all three of my psych ward stays, I've encountered the banter between patients about our situations. Patients, or rather 'inmates', discussing the 'jailers' (nurses and HCAs) and the 'prison' (the ward) in a jokey manner. But underneath the jokes, there is a small degree of truth in the banter.

My Final Psych Ward Update

As you may have guessed from the title, I am being discharged from the psych ward soon. In fact, I'm being discharged this Tuesday (17th). It was a bit of a shock to be told last Tuesday (10th) that I would be discharged. My regular psych was off on leave for a few weeks and on the Monday before he came back (2nd), I was told by the psych who was covering him that I could stay in hospital until I got a place of my own. So when my psych came back the week later and told me that I was being discharged, it really did surprise me.

How I'm Doing, Truthfully

Today's ward round went well, I went in hoping to get five hours of leave so was pleased when they gave me six hours. My meds are staying the same - 800 mg of quetiapine and my body is starting to tolerate it, meaning that I'm not so drowsy anymore. It's been all positive steps today.

My Experiences with Visual Hallucinations

A common symptom of schizophrenia that I've not really written about before is visual hallucinations, AKA seeing things. I've written about auditory hallucinations (voices) numerous times before and even created a YouTube video on the subject, which can be found here, but never really touched on the visual hallucination topic before.